Asshats and Mudlfaps

I like the word asshat. It speaks to my inner 13 year old. And mudflap rhymes, so that's good enough for me. but this post is mainly about asshats, not mudflaps, and in particular asshats of the depressed doggy variety.

The whole Hugo, sad and rabid puppy thingumy has been written about by many people, most of them more knowledgeable and closer to the subject than me, which was one reason I, fledgling writer that I am, haven't bothered. But now I do have something to say, so here we go.

Oh, it occurs to me dear reader that you may not know what I'm talking about. Well, you could go google it (go ahead, I'll wait), but the short of it is some white male authors don't particularly like non white male authors and have decided to organise block voting to 'bring back the glory days' (their words, not mine) of white male authors in sci fi and fantasy. They don't say that, of course. Evil never advertises it as such. They dress it up with blah di blah di blah. But anyway, that sums it up.

Thing is a lot of people, George RR Martin among them, have said this issue might end up breaking the Hugos, and I really don't think we have anything to worry about. Thing is, the sadsacks need to work at being racist, misogynistic pricks. While the world turns on and inclusion becomes ever the norm these throws need to actively work at being hateful. They need to go and try and convince enough other people to be hateful with them. And the thing is, while hate often is a lifelong thing, life, as it were, isn't. There's a certain amount of die off when it comes to stuff like this. Exhibit A: KKK membership isn't what it once was.

You only have to look at the rates of female and gay authors in the Hugo honour roll over time to see what happens when things are left to themselves. People begin to enjoy good writing for its own sake, and not give a damn at the colour of the hand holding the pen. Which is great and as it should be.

I actually had a fairly long diatribe mapped out in my head on this subject, but given my point is "Don't worry, racists die eventually" I really shouldn't take the piss and go on longer than necessary.

See you later people, and remember what the great ones said: Be excellent to one another.

Michael

A Glimpse at the Amateur Wordsmith

Alarm goes off at 5:50am.  Get out of bed - QUIETLY! Waking a sleeping Love of my Life (tm) at this hour is never a good idea, and if either of the children has even the inkling of an idea Daddy is awake and I kiss my morning writing window goodbye to cuddling up on the sofa and watching Scooby-Doo.... actually that doesn't sound s-no!  There is work to be done.

Sneak to the kitchen, avoiding all the floorboards I know through trial and error creak.  Put on water to boil (no kettle for me (too loud), so I need to go old skool and get a pan on the gas).  Get laptop out.  Realise I forgot to turn the volume down last night, so the gentle Windows log on chime sounds like a fire engine wired into a fog horn.

Freeze, listen for the sound of scampering feet.  Nothing.  Breath a sigh of relief, rub the sleep from my eyes and get typing.

Struggle with the suffocating feeling that all art is masturbation and who the hell am I to think I could force my writing on other people, and didn't I know there're Scooby-Doo episodes to watch?  Realise I just wasted five minutes, and pull myself together, ignore that inner voice and get writing.

6:30, and time to get ready for work.  There follows a whirlwind of making sandwiches, heating porridge, finding school uniforms and cleaning teeth (along with the usual "Look, the Batman and shark toothbrushes are equally good, there's no need to argue over them" debate).

7:30 and time to go.  Get to the train station, pray that should there be limited seating you don't get on with any elderly ladies or pregnant women (writing is important, but not that important).  Train arrives; cue Hunger Games style contest with high schoolers to get a seat - Ha!  In your face, hopeful youth!  Get laptop out (again), revel for once in the lack of Australian wifi connectivity, and get in an uninterrupted 40 minutes.

8:30, and the day job..... you really don't need to know about this bit.

12:00  Lunch time, woohoo!  Get out the laptop (again x2)  Gobble down a sandwich and get writing.  Realise you forgot to put on your out of office alert and accidentally answer your phone.  Automatically say "Uh-huh.... yeah...totally... yeah I have capacity" while I'm not listening as my mind wonders if Character A would really say that to Character B.

1:00  Back to work, but first to check the word count - score!  Then I see my work in-box and wonder where all this extra work came from.  Vaguely remember something about a phone call and curse self.

5:00, off we go, walk to the furthest train station from office to try and get a seat, work out elbows with people who just want to sit and listen to music (don't they realise what character A is about to say?).

6:00 Home, happiness, family and Lego.  Mainly Lego.  And convincing two young boys they really want to eat their meals and not play with Lego.  Did I mention Lego?

7:30 Kids in bed (minus Lego... hopefully), tidy up with Love of My Life (tm).  She tells me about her day.  I wonder if that's how Character B would have put it.  Accidentally call her Character B's name.  Now Love of my life (tm) thinks I'm either an idiot or having an affair.

9:00 Grab an extra hour before bed.  Thinks about how Love of my Life (tm) said Character B's words (OK, she didn't, but things often happen in my head which don't in reality).  Compare them to what I wrote.  Delete everything from that day and start again.

Remember, Terry, Death Can't Remember How the Knights Move

If it's wrong for a 36 year old man to cry at the passing of someone he met only once and briefly I don't care.Last night the world - not the literary one, the real one - lost one its great individuals.  Knowing it was coming does not make it easier, not for us and I can only say not for the people close to Sir Terry, although perhaps the sheer number of people to whom he mattered greatly will be some comfort to each other in our collective grief.We'll all have stories of how Terry's writing became important to us.  Mine was he saved me from myself.  Perhaps a tad over dramatic, but that's the point - he made me want to be a writer.  No, actually he didn't; he made me want to tell stories.  The two are different.  One has airs, the other don't, as Granny Weatherwax would say.Not many people can truly say they left the world in a better place then when they entered it.  As the man himself wrote, "No one is actually dead until the ripple they cause in the world die away" so He will be with us for a long time yet.Good byre, Terry, and thank you.Michael

Merry Christmas!

A blast from the past today.  a 100 word Christmas poem.  Enjoy, and Merry Christmas.
'Twas the night before Christmas, and throughout the house
Creature was stirring eating louse, mouse and spouse.
Nary a soul was safe From tentacle’d grasps,
Pulling all from their beds To scream their last gasp.
Naughty or nice, Creature does not care,
It’s boys, girls and parents Creature seeks to ensnare.
Bones fill its bellies allowing it to grow,
Oozing through windows Into the snow.
Soon there’ll be blood flowing throughout the streets,
Yo-ho-hos there won’t be, instead; there’ll be meat.
Remember this, child, as you slip into sleep:
Step from bed once more, and your soul Creature will reap.
Sleep tight and merry Christmas all!

Deadzone: Infestation in pictures

Since Mantic Games have announded the first expansion to their Deadzone game and what it will (vaguely) entail, I've been pretty much spending my whole time telling anyone who'll listen I've been writing the background and story for it.  You could say I was excited, and you'd be  on the money.Anyhoo, last Saturday Mantic had an open day at their Nottingham HQ, and wouldn't you know it they had some artwork and renders for show based on my notes.  It's like someone reached into my mind and tore the images free....It's gratifyling and thrilling to see that what imagined tranlsated well into through writing that other people saw something similar in their own head.  It's kinda like telepathy..... I must be sure to sure this power for good. Michael 

If I Were a Piggy I'd Sing Piggy Wiggy Wiggy Wiggy Woo!

So here's a nice surprise.  The Once Upon a Christmas anthology from Christmas Press Picture Books, which features yours truly, is counted among the best 25 Christmas childrens' books over at Childrens' Books Daily.

A magical Christmas mix of stories, poems, memoirs and illustrations from some of Australia’s favourite children’s authors and illustrators. From the funny to the ghostly, fantasy to adventure, from peace and love to action and the unexpected, from recipes to carols, whether you dip in or devour, read aloud or read under the covers, there’s something in this beautiful lavish book for everyone to enjoy. 

Which is a lovely thing to say, and I of course agree completely.  ;) Michael

'The Boar's Head' Gets All Pictoral

I had a wonderful surprise yesterday. It turns out my story in the upcoming 'Once Upon a Christmas' anthology from Christmas Press Picture Books rated its own illustration from the overly talented Ingrid Kallick.It's like magic. I wrote the words and its like someone saw what was in my head (which may or may not mean that The Voices were right all along, but that's for another time).If you're wondering what the illustration for The Boar's Head looks like, here 'tis.And if you're in the market for a little persons' collection of Christmas stories for this season, here you go

An Unexpected Surprise

The Drabblecast (you know, the Drabblecast) has a weekly contest where they set a theme and you have to write a one hundred word story.  Exactly 100, no more, not less.  I've taken part a few times, and I was pleasantly surprised the other day to find an email in my inbox telling me someone enjoyed one enough to record it for the DribblecastSo, thank you Tibbi, you did a great job, and I'm very happy you liked it enough to take the time. 

Ghostwoods Books on Kickstarter - A Good Cause for Good People and Good Fiction

Love fiction? 'Course you do! Love helping out the little guy? Of course, because you're a classy gal/guy (delete as appropriate). Love me? ....debatable. But so long as the answer to the first two was yes you might be interested in the kickstarter by Ghostwoods Books.Ghostwoods, or GWB to its friends, is a smalltime publisher with a good heart and some great books. They're running a kickstarter as a funding drive to set itself up to expand. They're aiming to be able to publish more books, and pay their authors fairly, which is always a good thing (see WWE for what happens when a writer is angry at their pay).

Anyhoo, for a few dollars you could help these guys along, and pick up an ebook or two. Might I suggest Cthulhu Lives!, featuring the hottest person writing this post right now, or Red Phone Box, a circular story exploration featuring Warren Ellis?

A Cthulhu Lives! review... and a digital high five

So here was, minding my own business, just aimlessly surfing the inter... OK, I've been googling pretty much none stop since the Cthulhu Lives! ARCs went out, so sue me.Anyway, I found this wonderful review of the collection here on the aptly named Library Thing from a lovely lady called Diana.  From now on every person I meet with that name shall receive a hug.  Maybe I'll get the right one eventually.Thank you for your kind words, Diana.  In lieu of said hug I offer you a digital high five (thi offer includes, but is not limited to, everyone reading)Cthulhu Lives!: An Eldritch Tribute to H.P.… 

Real Writer, Checking in

*Forces open the blog door against rusty hinges and blows dust from keyboard*Been a bit quiet here, eh?  I do apologise.  I've been rather busy, you see.  Mostly with stuff I'm afraid I can't share just yet, but soon, hopefully.  One thing I can share however is that Cthulhu Lives!, the anthology featuring yours truly from Ghostwoods Books, is now up for preorder on Amazon, and includes a blurb from Warren Ellis.Warren Ellis.Warren Ellis has read my work.Warren Ellis has read my work and didn't want to vomit.  I don't care where you're from, in my book that's a f***ing win!And to top that off Amazon emailed me recommending the books I'm published in.  I'm pretty certain Hemingway said something about this making a writer all official like.I'll leave you today with the song of the sphere.... cause it's awesome.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-MmWeZHsQzs  

Aurealis #71 Review at Tangent Online

So guess who got his first professional review?  (OK, OK, we've played this game before where I pretend you say random people I make witty come back (They are too witty!), so let's just cut to it this time, deal?  Cool).  That's right, me!Linky.It's a good one, too.  Hands on the table, it comes with a 'but, but I'm taking it in the way I should:  Challenge.  Accepted.And congrats to my publishing buddy, Emma Osborne.  She got the praise she deserves for "Clean Hands, Dirty Hands".

Aurealis Issue 71

Ding, ding, ding!  Publication day!  Woohoo!  High five!  Anyone?  Anyone..... don't leave me hanging.Aurealis Magazine issue 71 hits the e-street today and features the stellar talents of Emma Osborne  and yours truly.

This is great news for me.  For anyone writing SF in Australia, Aurealis is the goal.  It's about as good as it gets, and it's truly an honour to be deemed to have written something worthy of its pages.

That's enough gushing me from.  For a few of your shiny dollars an e-copy could be yours.  For a few more I'll even sign your Kindle....

Michael

A Promise to Myself

I was listening to the Writing Excuses podcast last week (you know what the WE 'cast is.... and if you don't you really should), and Howard Taylor made a very good point when asked 'How do you get your spouse to take your writing seriously?"He theorised that, as in writing, showing is better than telling.  Give up something you really enjoy doing in order to make time for your writing.  Show your other half you care enough about this to make sacrifices, or why should they?What stuck was not that my wife doesn't take my writing seriously.  She does.  I could not be more lucky (other than the usual) in having a spouse who supports and encourages me....  And I have made sacrifices.  I've given up a lot in order to make more writing time.... but as most of you find, as you secure your time to write, you do what you can to witter away that time.  It's part of the creative process, unhinging your brain to think in the background while you do mundane shit.But I realised that that's not being fair.  My wife fields the kids a lot for me.  She's supportive enough that when I finally become a published author that I should be able to do it full time.  So then I should be making more time.  She is giving me a gift, and I will not waste it.This is a round about way of saying get up that extra hour in the morning.  Do what you have to do to get those words down.  Do it.  Do it for yourself, but mostly, do it for your family.

Containment Protocol is a go....

Woohoo, publication day is here!  The lovely people at Mantic Games released Containment Protocol over the weekend, a collection of short stories around their tabletop game Deadzone, which was Kickstarted (and to a ridiculously successful degree) last year.  I back it, and on a side note the game is awesome, and this weekend got to be a part of of the growing Deadzone story as my short piece The Hunt was published in the collection.I had a lot of fun writing The Hunt.  The world Mantic have designed in Deadzone very much represents the zeitgesit of today, just as Games Workshop did in the 80s with Warhammer 40,000.  In it, we are presented with a galaxy run on a corporacracy, where the final word of law is what the largest corporation says it is.  It's serfdom in everything but name, which is basically the logical end result if capitalism is allowed to run unchecked.

Sound familiar?  Yup, scratch one down for why I find it so enticing.

Anyway, if you check it out I hope you like it... now I'm off to write another for their Dreadball anthology...

Michael

  

The Hugos and the Turning of the Shrew... Into Shits

I know, two posts in one month.  It must be Christmas.  Or perhaps I'm goaded into writing by the events in SFdom over the past week.I won't waste preamble, if you're here you're here through the usual SFF channels and I'm sure you've heard about the hoohaa around Jonathan Ross and the Hugos.  I don't need to explain, nor do I have to outline Neil Gaiman's (among a few others) who have spoken out in Ross's defence and pointed out the Emperor's Clothes in the twitterstorm which drew momentum from, in many cases, people who until that point had never even heard of Ross.The short version; I'm very much in Gaiman's camp on this.  The long version:  I'm not only disappointed in much of the SFF community over this issue, but disgusted.Among the comments on the Guardian's piece about the affair, one reader said:

Judging by the Twitter/Tumblr mob most calm and rational readers would be best to stay at home quietly reading their books and staying well away from getting involved with the 'fans'.

I wish it were just the fans who acted this way, but some instigators were well known authors, who up until this moment held themselves as part of the moral elite tackling the inherent issues currently within SF.One writer in particular has lost all my respect and future custom.What particularly got my ire up was the open letter by Farah Mendlesohn, who was committee member, who wrote:

[Ross] is a man who has made a fortune (6 million a year at one point) from abusing others—particularly women—live on air.

I've only seen such 'come, let us judge this man on his monetary success' type wording in Chinese communist propaganda, and that's before the flat out lying claim he's made all his success on making fun of people.The irony that some of the same people who have crusaded against what's wrong in SFF at the moment have turned into what they hunted has not been lost.Michael

Here Be Dragons...

...and here, and here, and here too.There's an immutable law which says whenever you read a fantasy novel (of a thick nature is a bonus, but not necessary) you will at one point or another flick to the front few pages looking for a map.  Blame Tolkien if you like, but I'd rather thank Tolkien.  By their nature, fantasy novels take place in other worlds, or at least realities so removed from our own explanation is needed to guide us through it as well as the narrative.But to me, the maps provide another purpose; they're a visual accompaniment to further draw us into the world.There's a piece on the Guardian at the moment talking about the art of Ian Miller (not the 'Dry Tost' kind in my Big Fat Greek Wedding).  Ian has a long history in the SFF genre, and was at least in part responsible for my love of the genre.  His illustrations in Games Workshop's early Warhammer Fantasy books held me enraptured for hours as I at first drunk in every detail, and then wondered what lay just of the horizon of the drawings.Erfberg  2011.  Dip pen-ink - watercolour -paper .     This is just the one from a plethora of castle and cityscape images. For some reason I can't stop drawing either. It started with a drawing I did of Gormenghast back in the seventies. Six versions on and several 'After Gormenghasts' I'm still hooked .  M John Harrison's  book Viriconium only enforced this  obsession.

Erfberg, 2011: Ian Miller

And this isn't an aspect of the genre which is lost to bygone times.  The Goliath series by Scott Westerfeld include a number of just beautiful illustrations throughout each book which delight even the 30 something me.

I don't think it's coincidence of the presence of illustrations in both children's literature and fantasy.  I've always held that adults who love fantasy and sci fi are just children who refused to grow up.  We hold onto the delightful, and will use any sense open to us to enjoy what we love.

This has been another disconnected rant from yours truly.

Michael

 

Lazarus and the Tank, on The Dunesteef Audio Fiction Magazine

Let's get this out of the way early: I really don't sound like that.If you're wondering what I'm talking about you'll have to listen to the recent edition of the Dunesteef Audio Fiction Magazine, where Big and Rish run a story of mine called Lazarus and the Tank.... and then do a Dick Van Dyke level impression.Don't ask.But do listen! (there's a link there, by the way)LazarusTank1 In all seriousness, I am truly honoured that they ran the story.  I've been listening to the podcast for years (and if you haven't, there's a 153 episodes for you to catch up on, you lucky person), long enough now when I hear their voices it's like listening to two old friends.Also kudos must go out to Tom Tancredi who did an excellent job with producing the cast, Craig Weinberg for the retro sci fi music (It made me want to play Mass Effect again) and Alyssa Quinn for the cover art, which suits the subject and sound effects perfectly.I hope you enjoy,Michael

Here Be Dagons

I just received an emailed from Salome Jones, the ever so helpful editor at Ghostwoods Books, which includes the cover for the Cthulhu Lives! anthology which shall include a story from yours truly.Behold!Picture 

Not too shabby if I do say so myself, and I do.

An initial release date was pencilled in for mid February, but that's been pushed back a little, but you better believe I'll be pushing the book here when it does hit.

Michael

Breach... and That's a Wrap

Part six of my story Breach appeared in the mantic magazine Ironwatch this week, and I'm breathing a sigh of relief.  Breach was a learning experiance for me.  It's the first time I've written a series and had an enforced deadline to write to.  Seeing the date looming closer and closer really ramps up the pressure to get the words down, but most of all it makes you realise when you're 'that'd good enough' level is.image

I don't think the story is as good as it could have been.  Partly because of that point I mentioned where I had to choose timeliness over quality, but also because I really, really, reallyreally, should have plotted it properly before.

Seriously, I had one chapter where my notes were 'Shit hits the fan, yo'.  I'm not exactly sure what the 'yo' was for, but you get the drift.

Tighter plotting would have lead to a tighter story.  The last two parts were nearly 12,000 words all up, and I think I could have gotten away with half of that had I known what I wanted to say.

But as I said, it was a learning experiance, and I've had a lot of nice things said about the story, and hey, i had a tonne of fun writing it.  Let's see what happens next...

Michael